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Now the short answer is all of them, just most of them would hand me my ass. But... There are a fair few that I could run the pockets of.
The Loveland Frog is just a 4 foot tall frog that walks on his hind legs. I could easily give this thing the ass beating of a century. Conclusion, he can get these hands.
The Ningen, besides his name sounding like a slur, has no special traits. It just is really big, fucker doesn't even have arms. Conclusion, I'm gonna lay him out
The Chupacabra also known as the goat-sucker, a nickname shared with MannySDF's mother, is a big hairy... Scaly.... Honestly I have no idea, but would I do know is that it avoids humans and only hunts small defenseless animals that you'd find a farm. This is a easy win for me, the Chupacabra has gotten to use to hunting the privileged sheltered animals of a farm and not the battle hardened animals of the wild, in short he's a pussy. Conclusion, I'm gonna spin his jaw
The Mongolian death worm..... It.... It's a fucking worm....
Conclusion, I'm gonna fuck both it and the Alaskan Bull worm up
The Mothman, said to be the omen of disasters he appears right before great events of tragedy happen, though it is said he's not the cause of these tragedies. To put it simply, he's a pacifist, when he shows up to the fight I can promise you right now a disaster will be underway. Conclusion, I'm gonna American History X his goofy ass.
So concludes a short list of some Cryptids that I could run the fade of. I may return to this in the future if I catch any other cryptids lacking that might need they shit rocked.
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Haxxlim
If a British Big Cat or a Bukit Timah Monkey Man ever pulled up on me, I'd knock their fucking teeth in, no questions asked. The British Big Cat especially can catch these hands.
I could also beat the assets of the Skunk ape, this stinky monkey that lives in Florida. I'd punt that bitch into the stratosphere. I could also absolutely smoke the Elwetritsch, this rooster with fat titties that lives in Germany. In conclusion, some of these cryptids are not safe.
by Haxxlim; ; Report
Haxxlim
What did mothman do to deserve this?? :(