Help me

Please help me ,make me stop feeling this way ,make me myself ,don't make me someone else.i don't want to feel this way anymore ,help me talk to my mother about this ,help me . Hug me , help me ,I can no longer write poetry and make art ,I'm losing myself,I'm becoming a corpse day by day ,help me .save me. Pull me up from the water. I don't want to feel filthy ,i don't want to feel anything but life. Make me feel it.i beg u.please please please please help me ,I don't know what's happening, I'm spiraling ,the cycle is getting too abrupt and fast , I'm gonna die , please save me ,I'm tierd of being this creature who goes through cycles this fast ,this abrupt,this filthily. Just help me.