I'm going in and out of shock..

As many other Americans are in this moment, I am going in and out of shock. I'd like to make it known that I looked through 90% of Project 2025, and about 30% of Project Esther. I fully understand what is in those, I was aware it was going to happen. Now that it is here I find myself silently panicking, I'm dissociating?.. 

I understand not everyone will like each other, but I don't get the flack Chris Valenti recieves; because it's like.. You can't call him wrong, or a fear mongerer.. When I was at a traumatizing point in my life I'd listen to him while doing tasks that were needed to be done.. Months ago he said we were gonna assist Israel in striking Iran. Everyone trolled, or said he was going to be wrong, sure as shit.. Here we are. While an example, every damn time he was trying to warn people, that warning should have been listened to. Every single thing this man has said has happened either fully, or started happening.. And without fail, both him and I end up being right 6 months later. 

I haven't posted on here in a minute, but everything is just so fucking tense right now that posting anywhere feels like a game of minesweeper.. 

The way its all crickets from these people on gas prices, groceries.. It's actually all too much. 

How a singular person on this planet could back him to this day is beyond me, and it's heartbreaking when it's people who said they loved me. 

The past few months I've been thinking. I know that there are people higher than the elite that we know. The worst part of it is that I know I haven't seen many president's elected, but never in my 27 years on this floating rock (yes, including his first term) have I been so horrified of a president. I had hope in the beginning of this thing.. The speed and direction of this thing on top of the two documents tells me that we are actually fucked.. 

The worst part of having people who support him that insist to have you on social media for me in all honesty is that my proof of impact is ignored or met with some stupid republican talking point and immediately invalidated. 

Every day is the same, I wake up, do what's needed, go to bed, and it repeats. Like nothing. I honestly thought I'd be hysterical this whole time, but I'm just zoning out.. 

My mind lacks words to express how I really feel.. I guess "alone" is pretty fitting.. It genuinely feels like we are surrounded by Nazis; and I don't mean that dramatically, but rather literal.