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I in good faith try looking into queer discourse to find my stance on stuff a lot but then i remember no one can even agree on anything ever and it's all so polarizing and hostile.
It's not like there's this ironclad pure and final truth in any of these discussions but everyone acts like there is, and idk if its purely all subjective either --- i think its some medium where everyone just comes to whatever conclusion they think is most logical and what they find most compelling whether it be through past life experiences, pre-existing values, etc.; after amassing enough information about it, and defend and alter their stances accordingly --- but its not some huge sin of someone to just have a take i disagree with, i forgive them and don't think it would do much good to hate people or infight.
I try to see everyone's opinions and accounts in good faith, and to see my own opinions to be subject to change and to not be so sure my own is what is true and final and irrefutable, i question myself often -- but who knows maybe that's a cop out and i just don't have a backbone maybe its naive and a bit idealistic to think like this but i really did wish people just got along.
At the same time i also feel like i might just be/be misconstrued as someone trying to act above and enlightened for being neutral on things - i.e. the "False Compromise Fallacy" or "Middle Ground Fallacy" -- and i understand people that might see me that way too, even if it is my instinct to defend my opinion.
'Dunno if this is a whole lotta nothing but just putting this out there i guess. This is mostly about like mspec queers/lesbians/gays disource and whatever the tma/tme and 'transandrophobia' discourse is, i don't have a strong opinion on either discussion and to be honest i'd rather not open either can of worms. I just try to mind my business and personally i guess i'm neutral on tma/tme and as a trans guy would rather use like - 'transmascphobia' since the other term is pretty controversial.
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🌥Daybreaker
I let too many years be poisoned by discourse, I hate semantics so much and have learned a lot of it is honestly just that. Take away the buzzwords and you'll find more people agreeing with you, or at least much more tolerant of hearing you out without automatically dumping you in a "good opinion/bad opinion" box right off the bat. I've actively tried to avoid queer and adjacent discourse for a while now, sounds like it has not changed since I last touched it. Life is so much more peaceful when you just pretend you don't know a thing about it.
i agree with this so hard.
I had a friend i dont talk to anymore who was big on being anti mspec lesbian and also very against the 'transandrophobia' term -- going as far as to calling it a hategroup and using tags like "transandrodorks." I understood where they were coming from and it was a shame because they were a generally cool person but it all felt so hostile and antagonistic?
I understand the creator of the term is problematic and i myself dont use the term but i dont think every trans guy that uses it is a transmisogynist or has a corrective rape kink?? (stuff they actually reposted/posted about.) Just because the label for something is problematic doesn't mean it's not a thing either, i had a friend put it like this - how despite 'aspergers' being a dated and problematic term that doesn't mean autism isnt real.
Anyways sorry for that whole spiel -- you're so right about just not caring. It's brought me so much more peace of mind lol.
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