intersectionality and how important it really is

as someone who is black, a lesbian, and a masculine woman, I find that each of the minorities I'm a part of seem to forget how much the whole of me is affected in other aspects. 

when I go to queer spaces, its heavily white populated and I'm one of the only black people there. not a lot of people talk to me (if I don't speak first), but will talk to my white friends  and introduce themselves WHILE I'M RIGHT THERE AND NOT EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE ME. 

in black spaces, give me a break, I am a total outcast. I dress masc, I talk "white" (whatever that means) and I'm a "weird" kid. I have maybe three black friends, not because I dont want to be friends w more, they just don't like me. being gay while black too is also looked down upon (colonization, homophobia, u get it)

in women spaces, I find its populated w straight white women a lot, not to mention how tied femininity is to being a woman to a lot of them (and being black, u have more pressure to be feminine since were already masculinized due to our features) and oof being a lesbian? immediate shunning, its apparent every single one of them think I'm drooling at the bit to be w them, and then in the same breath when their bfs annoy them, they say "I wish I was a lesbian" good God.

and finally, masc spaces. white dominated for sure. I think a lot of ppl expect black ppl to just use the term stud, which is for us, but its been so sexualized and made into this evil cheating stereotype (this is a huge problem w masculine queer women alone, could make a whole post about this) that I don't love using it. and in general, masc just fits better for me. I haven't really experienced much discrimination w other mascs, but its definitely the expectation of mascs being white.

so, what's the point of all this? make safe spaces like these actually safe. don't cater to one specific group of people, let everyone in. u want a safe space for women? trans women are gettin in there. pride events? disability accessible. I'm not saying these spaces I've been in are at fault for attracting ignorant people (they definitely don't do a good job of stopping it tho), I just find they foster such a harsh and isolating environment for people who fit that safe space category, but don't fit ur ideal mold. intersectionality is real, and something to always keep in mind when creating an inclusive environemnt