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Hi everyone. It's been along time from last day when II was there. It was... Very very very hard year.
Disclaimer: I text it without translator, so, I do mistake bcz English is not my native language. Please, if you read something below, be patient. I try my best.
In March I think, that my life becomes better. But it was false. I already have know that I have mental disease. I don't know whou it should be called in English, I'm sorry. I will check it later. But, what you should know: antidepressants don't work at all. They only do worse. This jumps from mania to depression and back was... Scare. I didn't understand what with me wrong, I asking myself: "I do medication, why life don't become better?!"
In June I have deep depression again. Untill the half of July. In July I feel better. In September I have a mania episode. And in the end of September until end of October I have deep depression again.
My b-day was at 24th of October. I'm 23 now. But... I think it would be perfect day. I think we will celebrate this all, like true family. But... My mother just ruin it. I was crying when I ate my birthday cake. My grandmother do it for me. She even write on it "Happy Birthday!" With cream (she has so good skill at writing... Do you want me to show it?). But I ate this cake and crying. Cause the center of this evening wasn't me. My mother.
And at my bday I went to my doctor. She say, that my mental health is so bad, that I should go for hospitalisation. When I say this to my relatives, they just laughed at me. Yes, they do it. "Haha you will be with real psycho!" Oh, thank you mom, I really wish you will just say something like "oh, it's so sad, but it's a big step for you future bcz your mental health is very important not only for you, but for us, too." But I don't hear nothing but laughing.
Now I'm at home. And I was hospitalised. All is okay. I was do a great job with psychologist. I'm no longer sad about this situation. As doctor said: "you mother just stupid bitch." Yes, it's frl! She just said it! And it was true.
My mental illness now with me until my life ends. It's kinda sad, but... Now I feel myself better. I wanna return to this comfort place and continue to post something here about my life, something about my work or my life.
Thank you for reading it. If you have any questions or you just wanna do ask something — fell free to use comments.
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peregrine
stay strong pal!
but u overcome it and had made amazing job!!! so proud of u ♡
bipolar disorder is real shite and i’m sorry to hear that u had to go through such experience especially on ur bday
p.s. i was also diagnosed with it few years ago and wasn’t taken seriously by my relatives so i can feel u so well … u really did an amazing job just getting better step by step
THANK YOU TO YOR REPLY!!
But... I don't have bipolar disorder. I check how it would be in English - Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
As I say, i feel better now! And now I'm really strong (bcz of medicine...)
by Kavi; ; Report
AND I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT SOMEBODY GO THROUGH THE SAME SHIT AS ME. I hope you feel better about this situation and you diagnosis now...
by Kavi; ; Report
oh yeah i know this one too … sorry for assuming!
by peregrine; ; Report
yeah i’m also in therapy for 3 years now and it feels good to grow and heal bit by bit ♡
by peregrine; ; Report
It's okay! I should check it when i was writing this text...
And I glad to hear this! 3 years it's a long path already... I wish that all will be alright with both of us! ♡( ◡‿◡ )
by Kavi; ; Report
yesss ૮₍ ｡-‘ᆺ‘-｡ ₎ა ♡
btw can u show the cake
by peregrine; ; Report
OKAY i will show it right now at the next blog note because I think it should stay in history
by Kavi; ; Report
OKAY i will show it right now at the next blog note because I think it should stay in history
by Kavi; ; Report
💕🫡
by peregrine; ; Report