different.?

Inside jokes with yourself,
keeping to your mindspace.
The only friend behind the screen on your computer.
Remaining hobbies is playing Valorant and Horrorporn.

How unfortunate. How pathetic. How useless.
Still smoking outside, still loud acting like a brute.
Unlike your ideal person you fantasize.
Quiet, reserves and kind. 

But hey, you're still friendly.
Approachable and your innate talents peeks through.
Despite your rough edges and unclassy attitude.
You wonder if they see through you...

Different school, Different course, new fitting shoes and a phone...
Would it really make any difference for you to change your gloomy mood?

yes. yes it would.
drastically.