Craving what hurts me

Why is love so disastrous?

"It's not like that" sure.

"I'm just busy" right, sorry.

"It's not your fault." It never is, until it is.

"I've been down lately, that's all" I'm sorry I add up to it.

"Maybe next weekend" next weekend never comes, bummer, right?

"Why are you always apologizing?" Cause you make me feel like I'm the problem.

Well, apparently, love is just a shit show I unfortunately take part in, it's just entertainment for the most fucking twisted showrunner ever, who can revel on other's pain, on fucking you over again and again.

Love is like picking roses, you want the beauty in it, only to end up pricking your fingers with the thorns until they bleed.

Love is like a slushy, pure bliss when you first drink it, painful freeze brain when you sip on it for too long like a fucking addict.

Love is like the sweet taste of cake that will end up giving you cavities, a tummy ache and will end up making you puke your guts out, cause you though you could eat a shitload of cake just to find out you can't.

Love is like getting a piercing, painful, but not bad at all, and cool looking, until it gets infected, and you suddenly regret it, but at the same time, you can't bring yourself to just give up on it and pull it out so your god-damned suffering stops.

Love is a fucked up little thing I can't seem to get away from, as much as it hurts me, I crave it, to my (very questionable and most probably stupid) understanding, that's just how humans work, though, if anything, we resemble dogs when it comes to it, always coming back to get a few scratches and be kicked away just to repeat that never-ending-cycle of affection and rejection we call love.