Ptsd, a poem vent thing

Ptsd isn't just Vietnam-esque flashbacks, its also feeling constantly stuck in the past. spinning in circles that will never end because they all lead to where they started. Its being unable to look at your father with the love and trust that you used to because you know you'll end up hurt again. Its watching everyone move on while you remain in survival mode. Its your emotions shutting off because emotions make trauma worse. Its the endless tv static noise because your brain would rather dissociate then remember.

God how i hate that noise. It may never go away.