Senior Sunrise

• August 25, 2025

Today has had a shaggy beginning. Today was Senior Sunrise, where everyone in the class of 2026 had to get up at around 5:30 and get to school by 6:15 so they could go out to a cold and wet football field to watch the sun rise. The night before, Mama pressured me and said to participate for the “experience” and that it’s a good way to start the end of high school, so I decided “Why not?” and went early the next morning. I woke up at 5:30 am and lowkey forgot why I was up so early. By the time it was 6:15, I was at the football field, and I had found my friend Ella Li, who was already waiting for me. We went to get some snacks from this homemade kiosk some teachers had made (God bless them for waking up so early and doing this for all of us out of pocket). I talked with Ella for a bit, and we caught up. Ella and I have been friends since the 8th grade, so I guess we’ve been for a while. Kind of. We don’t see each other as often anymore since we kind of parted ways during the last 3 ½ years, but we still keep in touch. Everything was going ok at that point. After 15-ish minutes, Ella’s other friend Isa and his girlfriend came over to Ella and me to sit near us. I recognize them but I don’t know them very well so there’s something in me that immediately makes me shy away and not want to talk. Ella and Isa were already talking away, so it wasn’t like me shutting up would bother them very much. I got up to get another juice box from the kiosk. I also got up to see if there was anyone else, I was friends with. I saw some people from band class, some people from photography, and even some people from my neighborhood. I would awkwardly wave at some and awkwardly smile at others. Made cringeworthy small talk with the rest. Good grief. So much for being a socialite. I walked up to these two girls I knew back in freshman year and mustered up the courage to try and catch up. The moment I approached them and said a friendly “Hi, guys”, one of the girls turned her back towards me and started giggling with her hand cupped over her mouth like I couldn’t see her. The other girl stretched an uncomfortable looking smile across her face and weakly waved her manicured hand. I went up to talk more but the first girl cut me off and blurted out: “We were just leaving.” They quickly scooped up the beach towel they were sitting on and walked away from me. After that trainwreck of a conversation, I quickly got my donut and sat back down where Ella and Isa were. Ella and I took some pictures, and as usual, I looked like a bag of shit that woke up at five and forgot to do his hair before leaving the house. Before leaving the football field, I took a group photo with my old friend group from freshman year. I looked around and saw how grown and somewhat mature my friends looked. Things just went by so fast. I remember when we were all just dumb little freshmen trying not to trip over our own shoes. Now we’re seniors in high school. One more step closer to adulthood. Finally, before I left, I asked this girl Natalia to take a photo of me and my ex-girlfriend Rocky. Our “relationship” only lasted a solid month before she pulled the ol’ “I’m just not ready for a relationship right now” schtick. Don't worry, we’re still friends and on good terms. Anyways, the picture Natalia took was awful. The now bright rising sun was blaring into the camera; I somehow was looking in another direction other than the camera and it was slightly out of focus. I would’ve asked for another, but it was like 7:05 and we had already been there for an hour, so I walked home. As I walked home, I looked at the many cars that would pass by on the road next to me. They were full of my peers who drove along in their nice little Nissan Ultima and their Ram 1500s while I walked home like a caveman in Converse. The car I was supposed to get was a navy-blue Honda that Mama had saved for me. In the middle of the night one day, a drunk driver tailgated the Honda and totaled it. WHILE IT WAS IN PARK. So, because of that, I have to walk, take the bus everywhere, and beg for rides from my mom (since she won’t let me drive her car at all). Speaking of buses, I have to get up and go to the bus stop to catch one for work. So much for a “senior experience”. Good grief.