To the One Who Let Me Go, My Moonless Sky

You look at me, but you do not see me.

Not truly.

You see the version of me that fits neatly into the world you understand,

The girl you have decided I am before I ever open my mouth.

You see dark eyes that do not waver,

A quietness you mistake for compliance,

A presence you assume is meant to linger in the background.

But I am not made to be simple.

I am not something small or safe or easily held.

I am not the kind of woman who waits to be chosen,

Who bends to fit the shape of someone else’s expectations.

I have spent my life carving space where none was given,

Fighting battles that will never be sung about,

Learning when to wield my voice and when silence is the sharper weapon.

I have built myself from fire and stone,

From every moment I was overlooked,

From every time I was told to be less.

I stitched myself back together with trembling hands,

Rebuilt the pieces you left behind,

Found warmth in another’s arms even as my heart ached with every step forward.

I have spent my life fighting to be seen,

To carve a place for myself in a world that sought to silence me.

And you

You, with your tired eyes and the weight of a city on your back

You saw me.

Truly saw me, in ways no one else ever dared.

You traced the edges of my soul with hands too careful,

As if you feared I would break apart in your grasp.

But I am not fragile.

I never was.

I have loved you in a way I will never love another.

That is my truth, my burden to bear.

But I will not be a ghost waiting in your shadow.

I will not let your absence define me.

Because I am more than the love you walked away from.

I am fire, I am light, I am everything you once feared to hold too tightly.

Your voice was once the only thing that could still the storm inside me,

A tether I held onto when the world threatened to pull me under.

And your hands

Gods, your hands.

I have memorized their warmth, the way they felt in my hair,

The way they steadied me when I thought I could stand on my own.

You were the only place I ever let my guard down,

The only one who saw past the armor I wore so well.

But love is not always enough.

It does not mend what is already broken,

Does not undo the choices we make in the name of duty.

You walked away,

Leaving behind only echoes of words I once clung to.

Telling me to move on,

To find happiness elsewhere,

As if love is something that can be set aside so easily.

Tell me, when you close your eyes at night,

Do you still see me?

Do you hear my laughter in the silence you once filled with your whispered promises?

Does it haunt you, the way I once fit so perfectly against your side?

You let me go.

You told me to move on.

So why does it feel like you never truly wanted me to?

And if you ever find yourself reaching for me again,

Know this,

I am no longer waiting.

I am no longer yours.

But god, how I once wished I could have been.

Yours no longer,

But once, with everything I had.