Difficulties shopping and my lack of good decor

Alright, since I'm banned from most local stores because they're all haters I gotta go like forever away to buy my awesome junk. I needed some snazzy decorations for my room eh? Turns out that the stuff I love is like 2 towns away. Traveling alllll the way basically across the whole world took guts. Unfortunately, guts are rare among this messed up world of butts. I am a huge wuss, so I had to travel with my family to accomplish this goal. Unfortunately the storeside clerks had quite a bit to say, as I failed to mention that I was equipped with an effigy of my 100% real wife. What a disaster of a day. I got kicked out of 6 different shops, and there was a larger than not load of strife. I failed to procure a lot of cool things that gave the vibe of my wife. Guess I'll have to stick to online shopping, eh?

Either that or get a life but this is funnier to me. Even while doing this, I'm as happy as can be.

-lusamines dissapointed but hopeful concubine