living as an aro/ace in 2023

basically being invisible

over the last couple years people have been slowly accepting the fact that there a tons of different sexual identities, lgtb+ community has been in the process of finding safe places just to be themselves. despite that, i feel like aro/ace community is still practically unknown. and with that, naturally, comes the feeling of never being recognized or understood. 

i came to realize this just recently, i finished my degree and started working in my first ever job. maybe it's because during high school and college, i was surrounded by wonderful diverse people who were part of the community, that i never felt different or even weird for being aro/ace. but now that i started working (in a private school as a teach) and started interacting with people from different backgrounds is that i truly felt that something was wrong with me for not wanting to start any type of relationship with someone. people just cannot understand that i do not want any kind of romantic relationship and much less the fact that in my 23 years of life i have never dated or even kissed anyone. 

a couple days ago, a colleague started asking me personal questions, like how many people i dated before, how many people i have kissed, how many people i have slept with. and i was fcking weirded out by how he was asking all of that out of nowhere. but mostly uneasy because i knew if answered honestly he would just make fun of me. so i just told him i dated a couple guys in high school but that was it. and then this motherfucker started making fun of me because he just could not understand how i was able to stay single during the whole 5 years of college. 

and i've seen tons of aro/ace people who just to avoid these kind of situations, completely lie about who they really are. just like i did. soooo, if any of you come across and aro/ace person, please do not make fun of them or even try to make them explain why they are aro/ace. just say "cool" and roll with it.